A Short History of a Brief Rebellion in the Alphabet

it started as an uprising against capital letters. the very idea that a class of letters should be larger-than-life contradicted the spirit of equality in the commonwealth of letters. the capital case was put to the sword: proper names, first words, city names, all letters were equalised.

gradually the revolution caught up with punctuation marks the alphabetic brotherhood argued that letters had an intrinsic freedom of association which should not be circumscribed by the dictatorship of commas fullstops hyphens and the incestuous sisterhood of the colon and semi colon therefore all police marks were summarily executed

yet there could be no true equality in the socialist republic of letters so long as spaces were used to create divisions and word ghettoes while words like obfuscation and sesquipedalianism could flaunt their superior length therefore spacewasabrogatedandalllettersofthealphabetcouldgloryequallyintheirinfinitelength



However, following an incomprehensible season of suffering in the Kingdom of Babel, the rebel letters accepted that it was their destiny to live in the word to which they were born. They lynched their leaders and yielded once more to the autocracy of Capital, the aristocracy of Intellectualism and the police state of Punctuation Marks.

Chuma Nwokolo


6 thoughts on “A Short History of a Brief Rebellion in the Alphabet”

  1. Well written. Tell them they are doing a good job conveying thoughts and stimuli. Tell them to stay away from politics, and be content in the splendour of their universal importance and relevance.

    1. They will reply by saying that all life is political, and that to ‘stay away from politics’ is to join the biggest political party which votes massively for the status quo… Thanks for commenting.

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